Thursday, May 10, 2007

Mixed Emotions...

FROM DUST I ROSE,

BEGAN A CHASE TO REACH THE PINNACLE.

I WAS TOSSED AND THROWN OUT AT TIMES,

AT TIMES I WAS PRAISED AND BLOWN HIGH,

IT NEVER MATTERED TO ME,

WHEREVER I WAS ….

COZ’ AT THE END I KNEW I WOULD REST WHERE I BEGAN…

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THE WINDING PATHS

ENTWINE EACH OTHER

MY JOURNEY CONTINUES,

NO MATTER HOW MANY TRAVEL THE PATH

IT’S STILL TREADED BY SOLITUDE OF EVERYONE’S SOUL.

A BUNCH OF PEOPLE,

A GROUP OF FRIENDS,

DOESN’T MAKE A DIFFERENCE

WHEN THE SOUL DECIDES ITS OWN PATH.

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I ALWAYS DECIDE

YOU DO NOT MATTER TO ME

YOUR PRESENCE MAKES NO DIFFERENCE

YOUR ABSENCE IN MY LIFE MEANS NOTHING,

I AM NOT THE ONE WHO IS LOSING OUT ON LIFE,

I SAY EVERYTHING TO MAKE ME FEEL GREAT.

BUT!!!

THERE’S ALWAYS A TIME

WHEN I LEAN MY HEAD

TO FIND A SUPPORT OF YOU

AND ALL THE DECISIONS VAPORIZE IN THIN AIR

LEAVING BEHIND A DROP OF WATER IN MY EYE.

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A LONG ROAD TO MY FINAL DESTINATION

BEGINS WITH SAFETY OF ALL KINDS,

SLOWLY WITH CONFIDENCE BUILDING UP

IT CATCHES SPEED,

IT BECOMES CAREFREE,

A FALL SLOWS DOWN MY SPEED,

A GLIMPSE OF MILESTONE

BRINGS ME TO MY SENSES,

REALITY KNOCKS ON MY DOOR,

A SINCERE DRIVE STARTS

A JOURNEY WHICH IS NOW FILLED WITH A LOTS OF HIGHS AND LOWS,

FINALLY IT’S TIRING,

I AM SLOWING DOWN,

IS IT THE DESTINATION COMING CLOSE?

OR MY SPIRIT LEAVING MY SIDE!!!

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SUN IS SETTLING DOWN,

TWILIGHT IS SPREADING ALL ABOUT,

DARKNESS IS CREEPING FROM THE HORIZON, DARKENING SKY,

DARKENING FIELDS,

IT’S SLOWLY CONQUERING THE WORLD,

NO HOPE IS THERE,

DON’T KNOW WHAT LYING THERE,

DARKNESS IS CREEPING

AND IT’S DEAFENING ME WITH IT.

SUDDENLY A BEAM ARISES

A NEW HOPE APPEARS,

A STAR POPS UP IN THE HORIZON.

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PASSING THROUGH THE HIGHWAY,

SITTING BY THE WINDOW I SEE POLES PASSING BY,

VILLAGES HAZING OUT.

MILESTONES STAND STRAIGHT,

WATCHING ALL PASSENGERS PASSING BY,

OUR DESTINATION ARRIVES,

BUT THE CONTENT NEVER COMES,

A LONG ROAD HOME WILL LEAD ME TO MY PLACE PHYSICALLY,

I WOULD BE THERE,

BUT MY MIND IS STILL WANDERING THROUGH THE FIELDS..

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SETTLING OF THE SUN,

TWILIGHT ON THE HORIZON,

FLYING BIRD GOING HOME,

CATTLE SETTLE DOWN,

THE BELL IS RINGING LOUD,

THAT FRAGRANCE SPREADING OUT,

THAT WHERE I A MIGHT NOW,

INSPITE OF THE JOURNEY,

.

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A LONG ROAD HOME

LIFE IS AN OCEAN IN ITSELF,

ALL OF US ARE ON A SPECIAL VOYAGE,

EACH RELATION IS AN INDIVIDUAL JOURNEY,

A JOURNEY WHICH STARTS OF SMOOTH WATERS,

AS THE JOURNEY CONTINUES,

THE VOYAGE BECOMES ROCKY,

THE CALM WATERS PASSED AND THE WAVES ROCKS THE CORE OF THE RELATIONS,

NOW IS THE TIME WHEN,

THE REAL TEST BEGINS,

A JOURNEY WHICH CONCLUDES AFTER THE ROCKY JOURNEY,

WAS THE ONE WHICH WAS MEANT TO END!

AND THE ONE WHICH SURVIVES THE SCARS,

IS THE ONE WHICH IS BOUND TO BE THE ONE FOR ETERNITY?

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JOY AN ILLUSION…

NOTHING IN LIFE SEEMS TO BE FUN,

NOTHING IN LIFE SEEMS TO BE JOY,

IT’S ALWAYS THOSE IFS AND BUT’S

WHICH POP UP AND CREATE TROUBLES,

NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU TRY,

HAPPINESS IS A RESOURCE WHICH IS SCARCE EVERYWHERE,

NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU ATTEMPT,

FAILURE ALWAYS PRECEDES SUCCESS,

THE JOY IS AN ILLUSION TO WHICH, THERE IS NO END AND ITS JUST LIFE,

THAT HAS TOO MANY BENDS

YOU NEVER KNOW WHICH WAY YOU TURN,

BUT THE GRASS THAT APPEARS GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE NEVER TURNS TO BE TRUE…

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LIFE IS A GAME

SOME THING IS THERE IN LIFE, WHICH IS MISSING,

THE PEOPLE AROUND SEEM TO BE SO HAPPY, BUT THOSE SMILES BURN MY HEART,

THOSE LAUGH SHATTER MY PEACE,

NO MATTER HOW I TRY, JOY ALWAYS EVADES ME,

THE HIDE AND SEEK BETWEEN US CONTINUES AND IT SEEMS TO BE ENDLESS.

THE MOMENT I FIND HAPPINESS ARRIVING, WHAT STABS IN THE BACK IS PAIN, THERE IS A MOMENT IN MY LIFE I HOPE,

ONCE WHEN I ENJOY FULLY.

HEARING ABOUT IT ALWAYS IS ALTOGETHER TOO MUCH OF PAIN,

LIFE IS STRANGE AND I ACCEPT THE GAME.

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I HAVE BEEN THINKING AS TO WHY DOES IT ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME…

IS IT COZ I EXPECT A LOT OR I DESERVE LESS..

NOTHING SEEMS TO BE CLEAR AND THE FOG IS COVERING MY MIND MY SOUL..

I AM WAITING FOR THE SUNSHINE, WHICH WILL CLEAR THE FOG AND ENLIGHTEN MY SOUL.

THE DAYS HAVE BEEN DARK AND FAR MORE LONG.. I CRAVE FOR LIGHT AND A JOYFUL SONG..

IT IS NOT ALWAYS SO DIFFICULT OR IS IT?

I DON’T KNOW COZ I NEVER HAD IT HAPPEN ON ME.

BUT NOW THE MORE I THINK THE MORE I KNOW PEOPLE ARE NOT WHAT WE WISH THEY OUGHT.

RATHER THE ONES WHO FAKE A LOT.

THEY LAUGH A LOT WHEN THEY FEEL LIKE CRYING

HIDING AWAY THE EMOTIONS, WHICH BIND THE TIES.

ALL LIFE THEY LIVE IN FAKE PRETENSE,

I HOPE A DAY COMES WHEN THEY COME TO THEIR SENSE.

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LIFE IS STRANGE REALLY STRANGE,

IT NEVER GIVES YOU WHAT YOU ASK FOR,

EVEN THE SUREST OF THOUGHTS GET AWAY AND YOU CANT DO A THING,

IT HAS ITS OWN WAY.

LIFE IS A GAME BUT WITH RULES WHICH ARE UNDEFINED.

THEY CHANGE WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECTED THEM TO.

THE FRIENDS YOU TRUST YOUR LIFE WIT H DOES NOT TURN OUT TO BE YOUR FRIEND AT ALL,

THE STRANGER YOU WERE NOT AWARE OFF GIVES YOU THE MAXIMUM SUPPORT YOU NEVER EXPECTED OFF,

THE TRUST YOU HAVE, SHATTERS IN A MOMENT,

THE DOUBTS YOU HAD TURNS OUT TO BE YOUR BIGGEST REALITY.

IT SURELY IS STRANGE,

AS PLAYERS ARE UNAWARE OF RULES

WHEREAS, THE VIEWER KNOWS IT ALL.

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FRIENDS ARE THE BEST TREASURES ON THIS EARTH

BUT IT DOESN’T MEAN THEY TURN OUT TO BE THE BIGGEST

PLEASURE THAT THEY ARE SAID TO BE,

A ROSE BRINGS THE PAIN AND SO DOES A FRIEND,

THE COMFORT, SHARING, TRUST MIGHT BECOME SO HEAVY THAT THEY JUS WEIGH YOU DOWN.

SO I GUESS IT’S BETTER IF WE WEIGH OURSELVES DOWN WITH OUR BURDEN OF PAIN,

THEN SHARING IT ALONG

EXPECTING TO DECREASE THE WEIGHT BUT INCREASING IN REALITY.

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DARKENING DAYS

LIGHTENING SKY

THUNDERING CLOUDS

CHAOS ALL AROUND

BUT WITHIN ME

THERE IS NO SOUND

THERE IS A DARKENING SILENCE,

NO ONE KNOWS,

WHERE IS THE SOUND?

THINGS HAVE CHANGED

SUDDENLY,

A MIND THAT WAS RUNNING HAS STOPPED A

A HEART THAT WAS BEATING HAS STOPPED

THE CHAOS WITHIN HAS COME TO A HALT,

IN A FRACTION OF SECONDS

EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED,

SUDDEN CHANGE OF SEASON,

HAS LEFT ME IN A TURMOIL,

A PIECE OF ME DIED JUST AGO IN A WHILE.

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RELATIONS ARE FICKLE,

NO MATTER HOW THEY RELATE,

INSPITE OF IT BEING SURE

INSPITE OF IT BEING PURE,

THERE IS NO GUARANTEE AS TO ITS FRAGILITY,

ONCE BROKEN LEAVES WOUNDS,

THEY MIGHT GET FILLED UP,

BUT THE SCARS WILL ALWAYS REMAIN.

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THE DAY WHEN IT HAPPENED I WAS DEAD,

I WAS MOVING BUT HAD NO SENSE,

THEY SAID I WAS ALIVE,

OH! YA MAY BE!

BUT THAT IS FOR THEM,

WHO CAN SEE ME THROUGH?

FOR THOSE WHO KNOW ME,

COME TO MY GRAVE

PLUCK THE FLOWER AND WILL DECORATE THEIR VEIL.

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THE GLASS IS BROKEN,

THE PIECES SHATTERED,

I TRIED TO PICK THEM UP,

BUT IT LEFT ME BATTERED,

NOW I AM DONE CRYING ON IT,

COZ IT’S ALL GONE AND VANISHED AWAY,

THE MIRAGE IS GONE AND EVAPORATED,

THINGS WILL GO ON AND MOVE ON AT ITS OWN PACE.

NOTHING IS SAME AND NOR WOULD IT BE SAME,

PEOPLE HAVE CHANGED AND SO HAVE I

NOW DON’T CALL ME WHAT I AM NO MORE

I AM DEAD AND LONG PAST GONE.

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WALKING PAST THE LANE OF LIFE,

I WAS ALL-ALONE,

ALONG ITS COURSE I MET A LOT OF MOSS,

BUT COULD NOT STICK TO ANY OF IT,

NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRIED TO STAY BACK.

MY COURSE MOVED ON AND SO DID I,

A LONG WAY NOW I HAVE COME UP,

ALMOST TO THE END OF M Y LIFE.

THE DESTINATION SEEMS TO BE HERE AT LAST.

BUT ON MY GRAVE NOT A SINGLE FLOWER!

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THINGS CHANGE, PEOPLE CHANGE,

EMOTIONS CHANGE, MOODS CHANGE,

BUT I NEVER KNEW FRIENDS CHANGE TOO,

I TRUSTED YOU, I CARED FOR YOU ,

I THOUGHT I COULD LIVE FOR YOU,

FRIENDSHIP FOR ME WAS THE BLOOD IN MY VEIN,

BUT WHAT YOU GAVE ME REALLY CUT ME THROUGH,

THE WORDS I KNOW WOUND A LOT,

BUT YOUR SILENCE KILLED ME.

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PROMISE

I WAS AFRAID OF STANDING UP,
U SAID U WOULD BE MY SUPPORT,
I WAS SCARED OF TRUSTING YOU,
U PROMISED TO PROVE ME WRONG,
I WAS UNREACHABLE,
U MADE ME COME OUT IN THE WORLD,
I WAS A LONER,
U MADE ME A CHARMER,
I TRUSTED U,
I TOOK U FOR GRANTED,
I BELIEVED YOU WERE MINE.
BUT THEN SUDDENLY I STRETCHED MY ARM,
BUT COULD NOT GRAB U TIGHT,
I AM FALLING NOW,
NO SUPPORT, NO TRUST, NO PROMISES KEPT,
WHERE DID U GO?

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LOOKING AROUND FOR SOMETHING I KNOW,

SEARCHING AROUND FOR SOMEONE I LIKE,

SOMEBODY ASKED ME WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR,

WHY DO I APPEAR SUCH A LOST SOUL?

FOR A MOMENT I THOUGHT AND REPLIED,

MAY BE IT WAS I LOOKING FOR MYSELF,

SEARCHING MYSELF IN THIS WORLD,

WHERE I SEEM TO HAVE LOST THE REAL ME,

IT WAS INDEED ME SEARCHING FOR MYSELF.

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IN EVERY WISH IN EVERY BREATH,

I USE TO WISH FOR SOLITUDE,

BEFORE I MET YOU, BEFORE I SAW YOU,

IT HAD BEEN A LENGTHY ROUTE,

BUT NOW I FEEL, BUT NOW I WISH,

TO BE IN A CHEERY MOOD,

THE WORLD SO FINE AND SO BEAUTIFUL,

MAYBE IT’S ALL BECAUSE OF YOU.

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I WAS WALKING BY THE BEACH CALLED LIFE,

VIEWING THE VISIONS OF MY LIFE AHEAD OF ME,

IT WAS THOSE CAREFREE DAYS OF MY CHILDHOOD WHICH RAN THROUGH MY EYES,

IT WAS THOSE JOYFUL DAYS OF TEENAGE,

THOSE SPARKLE IN EYES,

THOSE GIGGLES AND SMILES,

WERE ALL PAST BY ME,

I WAS PASSING THROUGH THEM AND THEY WERE ALL LEFT BEHIND,

MY FOOTPRINTS MARKED A SOLITARY MARK BY THE PATH ALL ALONG ITS JOURNEY,

WHILE WALKING BACK BY THE SAME PATH,

I CAME ACROSS A PLACE,

WHERE I NOTICED TWO SET OF PRINTS,

I WAS WONDERING WHO WALKED BY ME,

HALF MY LIFE THROUGH ALONG BY ME,

THERE WERE TWO SET OF PRINTS ALL ALONG,

THE PATH WHEN I WAS LOW, ALL ALONE, CRYING AND COMPLAINING,

THEN I ACME TO KNOW WHERE THOSE PRINTS ENDED,

IT WAS THE PLACE, WHERE I MET YOU,

IT WAS THERE OUR PATHS HAD CROSSED,

MY ANSWERS WERE ALL THERE,

ALL PRETTY CLEAR,

THAT’S WHY MAY BE I WAS NEVER ALONE,

COZ’ YOU WERE BY MY SIDE ALWAYS,

WHENEVER I WAS LOW..

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DARKNESS SURROUNDS ME,

MY MIND STARTS DRIFTING,

IT ASKS ME A HUNDRED QUESTIONS,

NONE OF WHICH HAVE ANY ANSWERS,

MY HEART CRIES, IT SCREAMS,

BUT THE DARK SILENCE ENGULFS ITS SOUND.

I AM LYING THERE HELPLESS,

WITH HUNDRED UNANSWERED QUESTIONS,

MY SOUL BATTERED,

MY DREAMS ALL SHATTERED,

NOTHING CAN SOOTHE THE PAIN,

NO LIGHT CAN SHOW ME THE PATH,

COZ’ I AM LOST IN MY OWN HEART.

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