Waiting for the end

A body wakes up,
Day after day
Follows the rhythm of life and goes about,
Chores after chores,
Minutes pass by into hours
Days goes by into weeks
Nothing seems to wake up the soul
Silently dying each day, within the body
The soul goes by
Awaiting the final awakening
Or probably the time
When it all stops by

Midnight Musings...

So after a loooong hiatus I am back with few scribbles which hit me in the middle of night... Finally some benefit of being the nocturnal animal that i have turned into..

1.ICE MAIDEN

Sitting alone in her stone castle, she led a solitary life, staring away the star lit nite, watching the dark turn light.. Silence her sole companion..

Crashing came thunder, disrupting all the peace.
Shaking the very foundations of her belief

Empty words,fake promises..

She looked at him with awe at first and blinked her eyes away..

Before he thinks he the ice melted,
The maiden turned into ice

2. NOTHING.... 

Nothing gave her joy,
Nothing gave her happiness.

The blind race to reach the top,
Had clearly no destination..

Chasing away her goals,
She shelved her very soul.
Seeking the true meaning of joy and pain
Went on and on...

Life goes on with each breath..
However the moment of breathtaking brilliance was the reason to live by.

Looking back was not an option,
Looking forward the only aim..

She went on to live by,
She went on to die alone..

3. ROOTS.... 

Why put the roots,
Why settle down,
Why follow a path...

Do this, this is right.. That is not correct..

Who made all this rules, why do I have to justify..

they say follow your heart
They say Be practical..

I hear, I nod... I do not get what they want..

They want me to try new things, they want me to be intelligent and make independent decisions..

When I decide.. All I hear is tsk tsk...

I loose my cool.. I walk past them.. I leave and I start living...
Its my path, my choice and the only sound I hear is a happy huba dub of my heart..

Jab Tak Hai Jaan... A fitting finale!!!

Disclaimer: Coming from a die hard SRK fan, all the cynics are requested to stay away from the review...

It seemed Yash Chopra had a premonition of his death... Starting from the title to the script the movie is an ode to his work in the industry... I could see a lot of his own work in various scenes and sequences..The grandois, the romance, the beautiful landscapes, intricate relationships it had it all... However musically this film didnt match up to his other albums.. A R Rahman - Gulzar magic was somehow missing.. Apart from Challa and Heer Heer, no other song worked...

Without giving away the plot, I would just talk about the things i loved about the typical film...


SRK with that stubble on a royalo enfield against the scenic Ladakh and London backdrop is at one of his best performance... No ONE and i mean NO ONE can romance like him... In this age of Anurag Kashyap genre of movies an out an out cliched romance will work only with Shahrukh... ( Yes thats the Fan talking)

Anushka Sharma is in yet entertaining role as the super girl.. This one surely can act and loook good at the same time... Unlike other leading lady - Katrina... Even Yash Chopra cant get her to act.. She is just a preety face who looks good in the backdrop... Probably should be used as one of the props.. The dance sequence where there were street crews locking and popping she started with her typical belly dance!!! The sequence however reminded me of Lamhe( Shridevi dancing away in anger) and Dil to Pagal hai(Dance of Envy sequence between Karishma and Madhuri).. where Dance was used as a language and it worked well in communicating the conversation between SRK and Katrina..

It may look like an old wine in new bottle as You will have a fleeting deja vu of his previous works in this film, but it has a twist from the other typical love triangles that we watch..

A MUST WATCH for all who love ROMANCE as a genre... Coz with the death of the maestro this grandness will never be repeated... And for all who dont have enough of COMEDY CIRCUS on TV can go and watch the repeat telecast of old jokes in SOS...

A special mention for all those who have still not been to Ladakh.. Each place shown in the movie was familiar and tugged a corner of the heart.. Lot of memories and nostalgia for that place... 

So my weekend started with a Cocktail...Aptly named.. Coz the movie was a mix of lot of things... It was beautifully packaged with good looking people.. Decent performances but yet very loose...it was like loose pearls.. The string was missing... Loved the music yet in film the first 2 songs were extremely random.

Coming to the plot, its a typical mish mash of recent bollywood dramas.. The newness was the bond of friendship... It is rare in hindi films when 2 preety ladies are frnds to an extent where she says - "gautam to aate jate rahenge.. I wnt u in my life", there were moments which made u jump of ur seats and laugh.. And some were damn predictable...

I would really love when the directors will go out and try n not use cliches like Maa ke Kangan in a young pepppy movie where the lead refuses to wear pants in the house... its pooh bani parvati moment.. The second half is where all the innovative ideas and brash attitude started going downwards..

If anyone asks how was the movie I would say it was good, but not good enuf... I was hoping for little extra from this drink.. Guess the fizz went off too soon...

Change is Constant!!!

It is so true - Day by Day we feel nothing is changing, Life has become mundane, stagnant and when we look back after a couple of months/years later we feel nothing is same. Things are different and so are people. When you fall in love for the first time, you feel that you cannot live without that person and you are unable to imaging your life without that special someone. You grow up, time passes, relations end and you end up looking back and laugh at your own choices. Such is life... Never say never coz when you negate somebody in the Universe hears you and plays it against you....


 Time is the Luxury that we do not have yet we take it for granted.
We neglect happy times in search of happier times.
We crib, We complain but do not make attempts to change the same
Its all about taking decisions and implementing it.
Life is all about taking chances.

Film Review - Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara

Today has been a day of realisations and it ended on a positive note with a masterpiece called - Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara... I guess I loved it more coz I am at the crossroads in my life trying to figure what I need to do... 

Kudos to Zoya Akhtar for weaving a beautiful story with amazing photography and poetry by Javed Saab. The cherry of the cake is the son- Farhan Akhtar as the madcapper, funloving copywriter cum poet who steals the show against Hrithik and Abhay. 

A simple story of 3 friends who goes on a roadtrip to fullfill their pact made in college days reminds of the promises we all make. Each character is beautifully essayed not forgeting 'Bagwati' ;) 

The movie proved yet another point which a lot of filmmakers have forgotten and that is comedies can be clean and abuses need not be made into script but script can have abuses. It is so subtle that one does not realises and the moment passes. 

Music is different and very hummable. Senorita and Ik junoon rocked but Der lagi lekin maine jeena sikh liya stays on ur lips after the movie... 

Katrina pulls off as a mixed indian well but it seems she can't do anything else but that. Kalki as overbearing, possesive fiance is alright. The Ja Chudail song would suit her better, but just wouldn't go with the vintage hue of the movie. 

Spain and adventure sports are to die for.. So before I die one more thing added in my bucket list and which is Spain Roadtrip.. Kya pata Zindagi Na Mile Dobara... 

Shades of Sky and Sea...

Sun, Sea,Sand and Sky.... Some of the natures most beautiful creation... Captured through the eyes of an amatuear's lenses...

Dum Maro Dum - Dark, Edgy, holds you one to your seat!!!

So what are your plans for this long weekend?
If nothing much and the summer heat is killing you why dont you head to Goa! Well take a super stylish trip to Goa with AB Jr as he takes you to the nook and corner of Goa as the super stylish cop. The guy is back and how... If he ever did a Raavan we forgive him for that...
Dum Maaro Dum.. Definately a dark horse... After an almost dry spell of good hindi movies and crazy cricket fever... Here is something different... Bold, edgy and most important - Stylish... Abhishek Bachchan as super cop does a kick ass job... The new comer - Rana Dugubati is a pleasant surprise too.. An absolute treat :)  
The much hyped Deepika number does not go remotely close to Sheila and Munni... They still stay way ahead of the doped version of classic - Dum Maro Dum... We say Zeenat Aman still did a better job then Deepika... Music is good otherwise...Te amo and Gaye tum gaye tum haunts you even after the movie..
The shaky scenes in twilight and drugged state will remind you of Anurag Kashyap and his master piece Dev D...  The climax will hit you hard and you might end up betting with friends about the bad guy's identity... Dont take tooo hard a guess its after all bollywood, your bad guy would not be so well hidden.. Before i go on and ruin the surprise for you  Guys please go and watch it this weekend...
 Its definately worth all the time and money!!! Full paisa vasool... While you are going to watch it, another small recomendation - Watch it at BIG Cinemas... :)

Love ka D End!!!

Thanks to apna bollywood going anti love and coming with films such as - Luv Ka the End, Pyar Ka Punchname etc...I decided to dedicate my next blog to anti love poetry. I tried to write something similiar and got badly stuck after the first paragraph.. Hence asked a friend who I was chatting with to complete the poetry... Well i now have two versions of the poem. One belongs to the era when Love was a sad ending and the other one states the mindframe where people end it for their own good... So here I present age old love vs new age love!!!

Apna Purana formula :

I love you, probably I would love u till the very end,

But the point is loving you didnt lead me anywhere,
and standstill mode is not what I like..
Leaving you was always an option but moving on seemed a tough task.
You made me realise that it was never meant to be, Its all futile...
Well f that's how its meant to be,

Why wouldnt it end for me too!
Today I look behind and the landscape has changed,
Nothing is as it was!
I have changed and so have you!
The undying love met an untimely death
And today we stand by its grave
Wondering who died!

New Age Love:

I love you, probably I would love u till the very end,

But loving you didn't lead me anywhere, and a standstill mode ain't for me..
Leaving you was always an option, but moving on seemed a tough task.
You made me realize that it was never meant to be, Its all futile...
So if that's how its meant to be, if this is what u always were,

I'm glad I know now, the selfish side that you command,
And the emptiness of your 'love'..
Its just that now I have a lot more love to give,
And this time I intend to share it with the better looking world.

* Italics - Courtesy a friend who chose to be anonymouse and not claim the fame!!!

Pandora's Box

That thing called Pandora’s Box…

I have a very bad memory and hence whenever I catch up with old friends and they mention some incident and some conversation… Chances are I would go blank or struggle with hazy memories… Its bad at times coz I just can’t seem to get any details right… Feels like those hindi film actors who wake up from coma and ask – Main kaun hoon? Main kaha hoon ?


OId memories are like Pandora’s Box… Each one of us have some good, bad, happy and sad memories tucked in corners of our brain which are brought back by certain situation or individual. Nostalgia hits you when you walk down the memory lane especially when someone reminds you of those good times you had. With me the case is I have to be literally hand held while I go back in time… I don’t know if its good or bad to forget but I had a weird feeling this time when my close friend reminded me of things which were happy memories, good times yet completely wiped out from my memory… Which I cud’nt believe I can forget. But here I was where I could not remember a word.


It felt as if I was listening to a story and those events had never happened to me… It felt like watching a film on your life enacted by people who resembled you but you can’t really believe it was you. You get the butterflies in the tummy and get goose bumps… If all this is part of growing up where memories of childhood, happy times get hazy… I refuse to grow up!!!

Seems that we opened our Pandora’s Box,

Those memories of past come rushing by,

It feels like million years have passed,

Since the times you held my hand,

Since the times when we laughed,

The memories we made.

Nostalgia haunts us,

Seems like we lead a different life,

It was another era that we lived,

It was another time where we made memories

It’s all gone and we are looking at it as strangers

Our little Pandora’s Box…

Nature's Canvas

Play of sun,clouds and sky... Always fascinates...

Some of the beautiful moments captured...

New Beginning...

At the crack of Dawn, I realised I have been chasing an unrealised dream, I have been running after a mirage.

Decided to stop the chase in realising the unattainable and start living in present.

A new day, A new beginning...

Dhobi Ghat

Till what extent does a husband go to make his wife happy!!! Well Aamir just gave you the best idea.. Invest in your wifes hobby and produced 'Dhobi Ghat'.. A personal video memoir of his highly intellectual wife which made no sense to the lay man.. Or atleast to me.. I was struggling through out the movie to understand the hidden meanings of her story (I m not sure if thr was one)...If only he would have sold it to one of those NGC/Discovery type channel, He would have made more money... Just that the abstract romance would have to be edited... I mean which NRI woman falls for a Dhobi.. agreed that if the Dhobi is like Prateik you mite look back at him.. Say give second looks.but who loiters around with him and leads the poor man. One obsessive artist who gets obseesed with vdeo letters in the house he moves in and makes her his muse.. An ending which I am still trying to understand..

Well few reason why you should go and watch this movie:
1) Some beautiful shots of Mumbai
2) Prateik Babbar
3) For M F Hussain lovers - Thr are Aamir's paintings.. I am sure you would love to know the meaning of too many colours on his canvas.
4) For classical music lovers - thr is some great abstract music... (Please explain WHY was it in the movie if you figure out)
5) You are truely devoted to Aamir and are ready to buy anything he sells..

Few reasons why Aamir made this movie:
1) He made a lot of money in 3 Idiots and didnt know what to do with it
2) His true love for his wife's talent...
3) To keep his wedding promise of supporting his wife unconditionally...

Please go and watch the movie... Try and understand the deeper meanings of the unexplained things of the movie called "Dhobhi Ghat".. Kiran Rao made yet another statement...This time not through her ghastly clothes but a highly intellectual movie..

Go for it guys... And do listen to them when they say stock up your Popcorn/Pepsi.. It really helps.. BTW Aamir didnt allow break in between the movie to retain his audience..

Hopelessly in LOVE!!!

7 salutes to the the master who created the masterpiece called 7 Khoon Maaf. Honestly the movie promotions and marketing had convinced me that it is a bad product getting over promoted, but all my myths were shattered when I saw the movie. Really wanted to stand up and applaud…  

From the scene one you are hooked on to this sensuous woman who is in search of eternal love and her failure in finding the right man leads to a justified elimination of each of her husband. No one could have justified it better. When the first husband is mercilessly killed you feel it is justified and truly deserved to be dead. That is the winning start he sets up. As the murder spree continues the sadistic justice seems rightly. Each one of her killings with her aid is brilliantly shot. I am no expert to comment on the craft of filmmaking, but purely as a viewer I am awed and in love with this frame by frame poetry called 7 Khoon Maaf.

Priyanka Chopra has outdone herself. She has proved that if given a chance she can prove her worth more than just a beautiful artifact in movies. It is out an out her film and she has done a super job. Vivaan Shah as Arun has done a brilliant job. His journey as the narrator and a witness to Sussanna’s killing spree and his love for her respite all that is worth all the debut awards next year. John Abraham and the Russian husband tend to bore you a bit but the presence of the seductress and her aid – butler, maid and the dumb guy fills in the void and you are hooked on to the next move made my them. The eye connects and the mute understanding between them is incredible. Irfaan Khan, Naseerudin Shah does a fairly good job. Anu Kapoor shone in the parts. His wedding and death scene were my personal favourite in the film.

Music was not as good as the signature Vishal Bhardwaj films but Awara and Bekaran has Vishal Bhardwaj written all over them. Darling is a clear winner while O Mama irritates you but stays with you even after the movie ends on the screen.

One final bow to the guy who made my decision to watch the film worth it all - Vishal Bhardwaj lives up to all the expectations… In fact it surpasses all of them. Last words for the genius – Vishal can rightly kill all the critics who didn’t understand his film and we would say – Saat khoon Maaf for him!

On board the journey called life...

Life has its own share of joys n sorrows and when an individual goes through his/her share, they are called matured, aged with experiance... Well what is it that decides your maturity? Thr is no scale developed by any scientist to determine that. But those who have the knack can see the face, eyes of n individual and tell how the world has treated and how has d individual fared in his exam called life. The fleeting soul moves from home to school to office to all the places life takes him and learns - unlearn.. Then thr times when u are confused.. Lost and need a beam of light to guide you through the rough patch of your life and u grope in darkness to find that support.. U hv frnds, well wishers who try and fail.. U listen, you think and in d end follow your heart.. I believe and agree to the messgae I read once.. If u are confused flip a coin by d time coin comes bk ur subconsiousness would have prayed for the choice of your heart.. So when I m lost I do all of ths and pray.. Pray to d lord to make d best choice for me.. Through me... So I m happy n satisfied knowing the almighty made the choice for me.. Let go in d flow of life.. Float aimlessly and the log will eventully rest on some shore.. That's my destiny.. Thts whr I belong...

At the Crossroads!!!

Whenever we are at the cross roads of our life... When we are expected to make the right choices and make all the right decision, why is it that we go through such a stress... Every choice comes with its own pros and cons.. Nothing is perfect. And if something looks perfect then just look out for the asterik mark.. the hidden terms and conditions which will follow... So why are we so afrain of making decisions.. What are we really afraid of? Are we afraid of failure which our wrong choices mite lead us to or we are afraid of disappointing others around us. I am not a synic but yes i am not the best of the optimist. I always try and see the negative first then after a huge fight between my head and heart the choices are justified.


Making choices is a nightmare for me! If Only life was like KBC! It would have been so much more easier... Every decisions would have had multiple options. The smallest decision of buying a watch took me some 6 months! I knw I knw its a hell lot of time but i cant seem to make choices in haste... But according to my observation i always seem to go with the choice i have made at the first go... My heart seems to decide and my brain reasons, fights and eventually agrees with what my heart has decided... Sometimes I think of this huge waste of time but it seems I get mental peace at the end of the whole R & D process...For me i will be fine with whatever choices i make even though they could be wrong.. Coz at the end of the day it would be my decision unlike some one elses choice forced upon me..

Wedding Bells!!!

Disclaimer:: This note is not meant to demean any of my married or about to be married friends.. I am very happy for you and wish you all the happiness.. But this is dedicated to all my single friends who are bearing the brunt of the deeds that u guys have done!!!
You know what?? XXXX is getting married!!!
Guess What!!! I am getting married!!!
Tada - XXXXX has updated his/her Relationship Status to married/engaged/commited

Since past year and half have been hearing from friends, collegues about them getting hooked, engaged and married..Off lately I have been hearin this words way too often... While i feel happy for all my friends who are getting hooked the question which ticks me off is when they end the conversation by asking - So when are you getting MARRIED? This 'M' word really gets to me!!! I cant understand the logic behind that question!! Is it because you know you are putting your happiness and freedom on stake that you want to wish to see all happily single people married!! Within a span of one year so many friends of mine have changed their display pics.. From being the self obsessed narcissism they have changed it to oh choo sweet couple pics!!! When I see that, the only thing which pops in my mind is WHY D HECK??

The worst one comes when you are at a social family gathering! The only reaction you get is - Oh My god u are all grown up... When are you inviting us to your wedding... ( the thing that goes in my mind is - Wht made you think i would never grow up!! and u wish to see me sacrificed to the fire gods just for the heck of a free meal!!)

The rare and extinct species of my single friends is quickly diminishing and I wish I can run a campaign similiar to 'Save the Tiger' :) Recently I was chatting up with a friend who is fortunately Hapy and Single!! and because he is male his expiry date has some more additional years as compared to the ones we females have! Now he was also cribbing about the noose getting tighter round his neck and my heart goes out to him... Coz as your age limit crosses 25 the number of profiles on various matrimonial sites and marriage bureaus increase too.. In case u are smart and lucky enough to catch hold of someone who you can bear for the rest of your life and is approved by your parent you can feel spared from the public humiliation of being paraded off as an eligible bachelor by friends and family..

PS: I am still single and very happy with my life..Dont try and mess it!!!

Scribbles

Suddenly I stopped and looked back... Got worried as to what was i running away from and what was i running after... I figured that all my life i chased something which i never wanted just because i didnt knew what i really wanted... What a waste of life... Though cant get the lost time once again... hope to make up for the time lost...

Some of you walked into my life and made it better, others walked out and made it bloody fantastic...!! and people commented

Its one of those days when i am happy with people, life and generally the way things are around me.. The other day i posted something on my status message on facebook - Some of you walked into my life and made it better, others walked out and made it bloody fantastic...!! and people commented... I think of all the people who have come and gone in my life.. On second thoughts not many have gone out... So this one is dedicated to all the superb people who have been in my life.. I wont name any one just for a simple reason, that if i miss someone they dnt feel bad!! :)

School days I had a very limited set of people i talked to and now when i think back and realise why I used to get comments of being a snob... I was not good looking nor intelligent yet had this weird problem... That has been their with me ever since.. I speak to only those who i like.. the rest of them can go to hell and i wouldnt care much. School gave me a friend for life.. We have been together eversince jr kg and touch wood still we are 'bumchums'. Love god for such a wonderful friend... Didnt have too many people around where I lived but yea their was a phase when we used to play with kids from our society... Their also I got to know later that i was considered to be a snob!!! (and i always thought i was a peoples person). Well their also I managed one good friend... who till date taunts me for all the attitude i gave back then!! ( Some people just dnt grow up ;P).. College life is supposed to be the most colourful time in a teenagers life... but being the big bore/snob that i was I started working with local NGO's and hence my presence in college was minimum.. Still that phase again i managed to get another friend who has been a wonderful blessing... She brought out another side of me out which I was not aware of ( Both of being Gemini had loads of facets) In the mean time I continued working.. and one side effect of working is you end up dealing with people who are elder then your own age so I had a lots of mentors who were elder but i bonded well with them... Had good learning graph thanks to them... Each of my job has taught me something... added something to my personality and made me what I am today. Ouch getting in the emotional mode i guess.. back to the point!

Of all this their is a friend who just came bumped in to my life and is today a very integral part... We still wonder how was it that we got talking in the first place.. but sometimes its destiny which plays its role well... That funny cartoon has been a blessing in disguise... and i m sure after reading i will get some more wise cracks! My first work after college which can be called my first official jobs out of NGO's was in an organisation where we were 4 women and since then all the organisations that i have worked ( except the current one ) have had imbalanced ration of woman:man say 4:1... All my guy friends always wanted to work in the organisation that i was (;P)... Working with woman has its own pros and cons... I cant count the number of media rounds in Ahmedabad with my collegue which ended at either a shopping mall or a coffee shop!! That used to be the best time... Finish work and hang out shopping or yummy coffee at Shambhu's... Long lunch breaks with microwave in office.. hand beated coffees...

That reminds me... my jobs introduced me to my first love - 'Coffee'... I was never into tea/coffee... but since I started work it became a ritual to have that morning cup of coffee as you come to office then one post lunch.. and one some time in evening before leaving... and if its gonna be a late nite.. then one more... Each office had its special coffee.. Ahmedabad we had beated coffee followed by filter coffee which we brought post our offsite down south... I had mastered the art of making best coffee and Its still my speciality!! Mumbai we went back to hand beaten coffee... we had a coffee beating gang... 3-4 of us had this ritual we followed in our office pantry and our popularity grew and i guess if v would have made a facebook community we would have got quite a few 'likes'...

Mumbai is the city which gave me more friends in one year then i had made in 22 years of life.. and today if I start counting those who I simply cant miss or ignore for a given occasion my hand falls short! That is quite something for someone who was considered a snob! I made so many of them...

My second stint in this city of dreams gave me some more friends who have become such an integral part of my life.. This time around I got to stay on my own with room mates which was a complete new experiance for some one who has lives in the protected environment of home for 23 years of life... Have eccentric people staying with me... the thing that connected each one of us - books... each one of us loves to read and we can catch our corners in the house and read!, films - each one of us is a filmi kida and we can go on and on if we are left to see the films... Food - Inspite of my hang ups in food due to my religion (which I am proud of and some people simply annoyed) connected.. My jain food became famous and I converted few of them atleast when i cook! In my current office we have a lunch table gang... Each one of us are as different as tom and jerry! ( couldnt think of any better simile) but when together we are a riot... Once again a bunch of people who i will never forget wherever I go and whatever I do!

If I see my friends list on facebook out of 560 people I have atleast 50 (wait is it all or more!!!) who i am close to! the rest I am regular acquaintance and catch up once in a while (online/ offline).

Oh in all this i forgot I have friends and then I have friends who have become my friends due to one of our comman friend and then we continue to stay in touch and become good friends.. Then their were people I spoke.. ignored and now speak again... In short if i make a transcript of the amount of gtalk chats I am sure I would be able to compile a huge volume of conversations!!!

PS: I think i went autobiographical but guess those who know me would not mind it!!!

Pal...

Zindagi guzar rahi thi inhi lamho main..
Gujarte hue lamhe ne kaano main kuch kaha..
Umeedo ke shor main ne mujhe sun ne na diya..
Main sochta raha ki woh kya keh raha tha..
Usi soch mai maine apna rasta badal diya..
Jab aage jake woh rasta kahi na gaya..
Tab mujhe ahsaas hua ke lamha keh raha tha..
Yahi tumhari manzil hai.